Divide And Conquer

Coming down from a week of vacation with my family, I could wax on and on about the importance of quality time as a family unit.  It is indeed very important to us to have all of our children with both of us parents as much as possible, so important that it happens most of the time.  But this post isn't about being altogether. 

Recently I was talking with my parents about buying a new car.  I come from a family of 7 children, so I thought I'd ask their opinion of larger than average families in larger than average cars.  When I mentioned possibly buying a large extended size club van, my Dad wrinkled his nose.  "Once we had all of you kids, we discovered how great family vacations were when we took 2 cars."  He went on to mention the benefits of all the many different combinations you could try - a boy car and a girl car, a "big kids" car and a "little kids" car, etc.  I remember listening to books on tape in a car with Dad and the older kids while Mom and the littles drove behind us, singing along loudly to "obnoxious" children's classics.  I remember girl talk time in the car with Mom while Dad and all the crazy boys drove in a separate car. My Mom mentioned how she never liked vans and was happy that she never had to drive one, even though she had so many children.  Granted we were spaced over the course of 16 years, so there were frequent times when only a few of us were going this place or that, so we rarely had need of one big car to get all of us to one location.

I'm still pretty far from making a decision about vehicle in my future, but this conversation really gave me a chance to think it all out.  And I've been noticing...

Just as it is important for us to try and get a bit of time with each of our kids to connect, it is important for them to connect individually with each other as well.  I notice how sweet the sister bond between my daughters has become when I get them away from the boys and they have a chance to focus on one another.  Taking my oldest two somewhere shows me how grown up they boy are, how well behaved, how smart.  Time with my two little guys gives me a chance to focus completely on their babyhood and enjoy Jonah's sweet toddler talk.

This week, with my oldest son away with his Grandparents, I've been able to interact with Dinah as the oldest daughter, my right hand girl.  It has been a truly special time.

Family time altogether is still number one in my book - but these times with just a few here and there are pretty special too.


How do you facilitate "alone time" for your children with each other?