Honey

Nothing is so strong as gentleness, nothing so gentle as real strength. 
Saint Francis de Sales 

He snuggles closer to me on my bed and rests his little boy paw on my belly, frowning a bit as he concentrates.

"There, did you feel that?" I whisper and he solemnly nods, and then flashes me that smile of his.  Peter crawls over for a snuggle and Jonah throws an arm around him.

"Yep, there's a baby in there, Peter.  Just like you!  Except a girl."

We spend the next few minutes discussing babies and his own arrival, and I pull up some pictures on the laptop for him to see.  At first he can't believe that the full lipped babe in the photos is really him.  Picture after picture of family members cradling him, and he looks up at me with shining eyes.

"When our new baby comes, I'm going to climb right up here and hold her, and then you can take my picture, ok Mom?"

Yes.  That sounds just about perfect.  Because the only thing better than a new baby is being able to share a new baby with people who love her already.

I'm thinking of our afternoon time together later on, after he's bedded down on the top bunk and Peter's soft snores drift from the crib on the other side of the room.  My three boys in their shared room, dreaming their dreams.

Raising children is hard work, and sometimes I can be distracted into thinking that is all it is.  I spent today doing laundry and scrubbing bathrooms and putting out the hundreds of little fires that arise just from living.  Correcting table manners and requiring apologies and inspecting chores can take such a big chunk out of the day that I can forget to enjoy my children. What's worse, I realize that I can be short and impatient, my words can come forth unchecked and, in doing so, I can cause some of the issues I am trying so hard to prevent.

The truth is, parents who speak negatively to children, who harp on mistakes and speak a constant stream of exasperation - we can cause a spiral.  Raising children who behave begins with raising children who long to please their parents - something that can evaporate in their hearts when Mama and Daddy only see their mistakes.

I've been that parent.  When Dinah grabbed too much laundry to carry up, her own folded pile and another besides, I warned her it would be too much.  So when my just-folded clothes teetered, and then fell down the stairs?  Words just barreled out of me at her.  Words I had no business saying, not to a 7 year old girl just trying her best.

That verse I learned as a little girl pops into my head out of nowhere, and I know what I have to do.

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.

Prov. 15:1

Tonight, I'm praying for honey.  From my mouth to their ears, soft and gentle words.  That is not to say devoid of instruction, or discipline where discipline is due, but rather to keep things gentle and pleasant.  To make sweet moments like the one earlier with my two little boys the norm, rather than the exception.  To stop and smell the roses of raising little ones, and to keep the distractions at bay.

Tumbled laundry takes 5 minutes to remedy, but the heart of a child can be lost in an instant.  Drizzling on golden grace, I'm bent on wooing their hearts, one by one.



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