Thursday, March 27, 2014
One Thing At A Time
With Dinah's celebration on Sunday, we finished up our "Birthday Month" celebrations. A bit earlier than normal this year, due to some end of the month travels we have planned. It has been a kind of a mad dash, 4 birthdays celebrated in just two weeks with company thrown in for good measure, but that's how it goes around here. Today is Jonah's actual 5th birthday, so I'm thinking a little about that sweet Spring day while putting away birthday crowns. Another year down. Another year lived well, or so I hope.
I'm in that inbetween space today of catching my breath from the last week and gearing up for the next huge undertaking. In reality, I shouldn't be catching my breath at all - there's really no time for that. My list is long and apparently not one of those lists that checks itself off. It's actually a bit debilitating just to look at, knowing full well that life doesn't pause just because I have more to do. Those smooth days of making a list and executing it in an organized and timely fashion are long past. It's somewhat of an every day struggle for me to be alright with that - and really just take it one thing at a time. I need to remember that the clutter and chaos that I'm navigating is not what defines me at this moment. The interruptions and the squabbles of the kids, the 10+ loads of laundry to clean and pack and the grocery list that just keeps on growing - that's not the running tally of the merit of my life. When I remember that, I don't take it all as personally. When I'm ok with it, I can move forward.
Packing a large family for even a short out of town trip looks quite a bit like preparing for the apocalypse (or Y2K, if you are my crazy mom.). Today I bake snacks for the car trip and remind my husband to get an oil change. My baby has a cold and slows me down with her needs - that's just the way it is. My sister in law takes my kids so I can finish up here and outside I can see all the mess that Winter left behind and try hard to just let it be until we get back.
The best prepared list in the world can't account for the constant and continual onslaught that is life here...but maybe that's just as it should be. When I know better than to think that a few lines on notebook paper could properly account for life here, I'm open to the days overflowing with life as it presents itself. One thing at a time, one task at a time, one moment at a time. Mindfully making my way through a life that's not always what I planned, but is always just where I'm meant to be.
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