Last night, a friend stopped by while we were out to drop off a generous gift. Upon returning, my first thought was one of gratitude. My second was one of shame.
The lawn is several inches past acceptable, speaking to the sudden change from dry weather in the past few weeks, as well as the absence of a certain lawn-mowing son. The trash can overflowing next to the garage, flies swirling around. The yard a mess of toys, if you can see them, hidden by the luxuriously overgrown lawn. The deck a mess of whatever the kids have left laying around. The driveway brightly colored with smashed chalk.
What if she looked inside? I knew what she would have seen. Dishes, not just piled in the sink, but on most surfaces. Toys and laundry and random odds and ends spread far and wide. Suitcases not yet unpacked from a trip we returned from a week ago.
This week has been a rough one, one that saw me more horizontal than vertical thanks to some illness. One where just feeding the kids lunch mattered more than dishes. One where my darling husband did his level best to slip on my responsibilities after long days of shouldering his own. In short, a week of just getting by.
Yes, sometimes Mothering can require getting it done in the midst of a mess. A hard one for me to accept. I know that I am more than this mess, that my friend, if she did peek inside, would not judge me or find me lacking because of a snapshot of my space at this time. Yet still it can be hard for me not to be distracted by the backed up weeks worth of laundry and bathrooms that I will mercifully leave to your imagination. Sometimes the mental noise that the visual clutter screams into my brain can drown out the people who need me the very most.
It happens to most of us from time to time. When life unexpectedly takes a wild turn, or a certain phase has us a bit off balance for a time. When Mama has little to give at a certain season in life, it is so important to give first to the souls in our care - not the stuff. Choose the children first and don't sweat the rest. There will be messy days, weeks, months. A wise mother is one who places stories above sweeping, lives before laundry, snuggles above scrubbing.
These things matter, and yes have their place. But mothering in the midst of this great and mighty mess has served as a reminder to me that people will always matter more.
I've been known to lament certain messes in my life. "I can't leave this earth until I organize the basement!" I sigh. The idea being that someone may come upon my mess, and even if I was no longer earth-side, I can't bear the thought. But when I think ahead to what waits on the other side, I realize - surely not questions about the state of the bed linens and the date the refrigerator was last cleaned. No, I think I'll be asked about the souls I was entrusted and the priority I placed on what God has called a blessed gift. And even if I leave behind cheerios under the sofa and a basket of mismatched socks on the stairs, I pray that I can say I put my little ones first.
{It's Mindful Mothering Mondays, a day to take a deep breath and write out your mothering journey, whatever form it takes. A day to link up for encouragement from others who are in this same phase of life. A day of writing out the trials and triumphs and what you're learning right where you are, right now.
You might post recent struggles or thoughts. Maybe just a picture or a quote. Or maybe you'll just come here and read the links that others post. Whatever form your participation takes, this is a day for you.
We are all in this, together. Together, we can encourage and build one another up, be honest with our shortcomings and strengthened by community to keep fighting the good fight.
I chose Mondays because what Mama doesn't need a little encouragement on a Monday? As such, I'll have the link up ready to go on Sunday night for you to begin submitting your links.
I hope you'll meet with me each Monday! Here's what to do ~
Link up your post below. Remember to put the link to the exact post you want to link, and not just your blog url. Include in your post a link back here so others who want to join in can find us! And visit some other Mamas who have linked up.
Post the community graphic within your post, so people who are reading your Mindful Mothering post can come back here and find the rest of us!
Invite the writers of your favorite blogs to join in!
Share this meme with others on facebook and twitter. This community is for all moms, and the more that participate, the more we will be able to enjoy!!}
Grab the graphic here:
{If you enjoyed this post, please consider leaving a comment or follow me by email at the top right hand of the screen to have future posts sent to you}
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