Pregnancy was a wonderful journey for me. Yes, there was the first trimester nausea all. day. long. but once that passed I settled into the unknown with joy, love and trust. I trusted my body throughout pregnancy and I let that same trust follow me into my homebirth. I let my body lead the way.
Holding my little man for the first time, looking into his dark eyes, feeling him against my skin, those are memories I will hold close to my heart forever.
It was during our first few months together as mother and son that I realized Reece did not fit the “normal” as far as newborns go, you know, the normal you read about in the books. The baby who feeds on schedule, sleeps on schedule, can be put down without crying, and so on. Reece nursed non-stop. He napped for 20 minutes at a time and never at the same time. He wanted to be held all the time, by me and no one else. I questioned whether I was doing something wrong. I wondered if I just wasn’t cut out for this mothering gig. I sat in darkness at night, Reece in my arms, crying.
And then it hit me one day, I had somehow lost trust in our journey. Throughout the journey of pregnancy and birth I trusted things to happen as they should. I trusted the process and I let my body lead. After his birth I focused on how Reece was not conforming to the baby books instead of trusting our journey to unfold as it should.
In that moment of realization everything shifted. We became partners in the dance of life. I let Reece take the lead, I followed, holding his hand and journeying his path with him. Yes, there were times when I took the lead, setting boundaries when necessary, but for the most part I let him lead.
This shift completely changed our journey together. We are partners, sharing his journey together. I watch as he explores and discovers the world around him. I slow down so he can really take in the world with all of his senses. I hold his hand when he needs support and I let it go when he wants to fly on his own.
This journey has not been a long one, we are only 4 years into it, but it has been a good one. I offer gratitude each and every day that he chose me to be his partner in the dance of his life. I am honoured to be his mother and so very happy I get to share in his journey.
{It's Mindful Mothering Mondays, a day to take a deep breath and write out your mothering journey, whatever form it takes. A day to link up for encouragement from others who are in this same phase of life. A day of writing out the trials and triumphs and what you're learning right where you are, right now.
You might post recent struggles or thoughts. Maybe just a picture or a quote. Or maybe you'll just come here and read the links that others post. Whatever form your participation takes, this is a day for you.
We are all in this, together. Together, we can encourage and build one another up, be honest with our shortcomings and strengthened by community to keep fighting the good fight.
I chose Mondays because what Mama doesn't need a little encouragement on a Monday? As such, I'll have the link up ready to go on Sunday night for you to begin submitting your links.
I hope you'll meet with me each Monday! Here's what to do ~
Link up your post below. Remember to put the link to the exact post you want to link, and not just your blog url. Include in your post a link back here so others who want to join in can find us! And visit some other Mamas who have linked up.
Post the community graphic within your post, so people who are reading your Mindful Mothering post can come back here and find the rest of us!
Invite the writers of your favorite blogs to join in!
Share this meme with others on facebook and twitter. This community is for all moms, and the more that participate, the more we will be able to enjoy!!}
Grab the graphic here:
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