She's been asking to make dinner almost every day. "Mom, what are we making today?" she'll ask, squinting at my horrible handwritten scrawl on notepaper stuck to the fridge. More and more, I hand over the reins. More and more, she assures me "I got it. I'll be careful." And I watch my little girl chop vegetables with increasing speed and slip them in the soup pot like she's been doing it her whole life.
She's growing and shouldering more. Not because I forced her, but because she's ready. I think about it while we're having a stand off over a sheet of Math problems and her lip is jutted out in 8 year old defiance that used to scare me to death. Aware of my own humanity, my own failures and lazyness, I'd look down on this child I'm supposed to be raising and think "I'm screwing this up. I'm going to ruin her."
The thing is this: Mamas matter. What we do, who we are, how we stand in the middle of the family like the centermost pole in a circus big top. While focusing on how important our role is - sometimes we can overstate. Over shoot it. Taking on more than our share of guilt and responsibility, we can forget that we aren't making or breaking our children with every little thing we do or don't do. Sometimes they are just plain growing up.
In our world where there are Ivy League preschools with waiting lists full of babies who haven't even been born yet, sometimes it can feel like it really is all on us. Every failure or success, triumph or misstep our children make - 100% up to us. But it's not. When I realize it, I can practically see the grace in it.
I won't be a perfect Mom. Even if I was, it wouldn't guarantee how these kids of mine turn out. Instead, I'll be the Mom who watches them grow and is there as much or as little as they need, all the way. Thankful that before the world existed, God knew their names, their futures, their hearts. And while I'm here to guide them along the way, I'm not a Soul-shaper. He is.
She served chili she made herself for dinner that night, pride palpable as she dished it up. I can't help but smile - watching this amazing creature become more than I could have ever imagined.
{It's Mindful Mothering Mondays, a day to take a deep breath and write out your mothering journey, whatever form it takes. A day to link up for encouragement from others who are in this same phase of life. A day of writing out the trials and triumphs and what you're learning right where you are, right now.
You might post recent struggles or thoughts. Maybe just a picture or a quote. Or maybe you'll just come here and read the links that others post. Whatever form your participation takes, this is a day for you.
We are all in this, together. Together, we can encourage and build one another up, be honest with our shortcomings and strengthened by community to keep fighting the good fight.
I chose Mondays because what Mama doesn't need a little encouragement on a Monday? As such, I'll have the link up ready to go on Sunday night for you to begin submitting your links.
I hope you'll meet with me each Monday! Here's what to do ~
Link up your post below. Remember to put the link to the exact post you want to link, and not just your blog url. Include in your post a link back here so others who want to join in can find us! And visit some other Mamas who have linked up.
Post the community graphic within your post, so people who are reading your Mindful Mothering post can come back here and find the rest of us!
Invite the writers of your favorite blogs to join in!
Share this meme with others on facebook and twitter. This community is for all moms, and the more that participate, the more we will be able to enjoy!!}
Grab the graphic here:
Simply beautiful.
ReplyDeleteLove the way they grow up! Toddler has just decided to start participating in chores, so everyone is moving up a level! I have to rework my chore charts again, but that's OK...K
ReplyDeleteBeautiful post. Thank you.
ReplyDelete