This time she sounded relaxed; happy. She told how she has been trying to relax and enjoy her time, not sweat the little things and just simply be happy. She reminded me how this is our one life, and one day it will all be over.
I chewed these thoughts over once we had said goodbye. The past two weeks have been rough on me and I know I've been spending each day looking forward to the next, hopeful that the morning would bring about a miraculous recovery. Its easy to wish life away during the hard times. When I do that, though, I miss out on the blessings of the now.
I wrote a while back about my "Mama Dreams," my hopes for the future, my vision of life, perfected. I realize now it would be a mistake to wait around for the someday. Life is happening now. If I can find a way to live my dreams right where I am now, with what I have currently been given, why, I could have the life I've always hoped for.
I could wait until we can somehow, someday afford a home on a few acres - a great garden patch out back. Or I could cultivate what I have now, taking what I have and pushing it to the limit. Truthfully, if I can't manage to get control of a few garden boxes, even if I do get that little plot of earth, what would I do with it? This summer, I'm living my vision of life in the country - right here in my downtown back yard.
I can't open my dream yarn/fabric store complete with drop in knit nights right now, but I can open my little home now and have friends over to craft and talk and bond.
There is so much that I want to do that I can do, yes, right now and right here. In tweaking those dreams a bit, they can become reality.
This year, I'm bent on living the dream - all of them. I'll write and I'll garden, I'll knit and talk birth and breastfeeding with other mamas. I'll live the life I've always wanted - maybe a little differently than I had imagined, but good just the same.
I always love your writing even if I don't comment often. Thank you for being such a blessing!
ReplyDeleteBeautiful. Can't wait to hear about your little backyard garden adventures. It really is amazing how much you can do with a small space- there are a lot of great books out there right now on this topic, have you checked your library?
ReplyDeleteI agree with this. As someone who is giving up the 5 acres, the goats, the chickens, the 8 garden boxes and my quiet country homestead...for suburbia, I am going to live life the way I want, in the confines I am given by our dear Lord and Savior. His perimeters and my interpretation therein. I'll have garden boxes in suburbia. I'll still hang my clothes in the wind anyway I can. I'll still love God and walk barefoot. In the country or in the city, each day is a gift and full of possibilities.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful, Danielle!
ReplyDeleteKate - I do need to get down to the library (a whole block away, one of the things I DO love about city living), although it may require a scavenger hunt for the elusive library books that seem to scatter and hide whenever we bring them home. My mom gave me a book called "square foot gardening" that she read up on before setting out those garden boxes. Hopeful that things go well this year!
Love this! Such a lovely post sister! Good for you! Everything is possible with God. He planted those great dreams and sweet desires in us and he doesn't always expect us to just wait and hope for the "perfect timing". Sometimes he does make us chill and wait or He says no, but you are so right. A lot of times we just have to look around, thank God for what He gave us, and see how creatively he can daily fulfill every pulled heart string.
ReplyDelete~Amanda
So true, so true. I never imagined myself where I am now. I didn't think it was for me. I was busy making other plans. But God has a way of subtlely and lovingly steering you in the direction He has for you. And while it may not be what you thought you wanted, it will definitely be what you Need....and that makes it all the better.
ReplyDeleteEnjoy your posts so much.
Thank you so much for posting this, it is exactly what I needed to hear!! Not only for the encouragement, but for the fact that our dreams are so similar it almost seemed like me writing it! God bless and I can't wait to hear updates on how it all goes!
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